HOLY SHIT…
I have been in Maryland for three months now and I finally decided (after looking at my tore up head in the mirror) to look for a barber. Where I live, dare I say it is “lacking in color” and thus the barbers of color are non-existant. I went online and found a place in downtown Silver Spring and ventured out to get my misshapen hairline fixed. Going to the barber’s is an interesting experience for a black man. Where one goes for a haircut has a lot of activity, different characters and lots of conversations ongoing about everything under the sun from politics, sports and who not to trust in the neighborhood. I really didn’t know what to expect but I had to get this hair off my head and I needed to find a place and fast.
I pulled up, parked and walked to the door and before I could walk in I was greeted by one of the barbers standing outside. He asked if I had any particular person in mind for a cut. I simply said no, I need a cut. So I went in and sat down in his chair.
That’s where it got kind of weird…
He did a good job cutting my hair although it took him an hour. I kept wondering why does he keep running the clippers across my head? I said close, not bald. He did get it close, real close. So I had to give him the benefit of the doubt that since this is the first time he is working with my head, it would take him a bit longer. What was weird was the conversation that we had. It started out rather innocently (these dudes had the Tyra show on the TV…huh?) and a comment made about one of the guests set my barber off on the most tangential conversation I have ever had in a barber chair. First he talked about how there are obvious differences in white and black people but then started giving “data” which supported what he was speaking on. There was only so much I could say without sounding like I was giving him the thumbs up on this BS. From biology, we talked about obscure books which lead him into talking about the occult (and asked me what it meant…WTF!!) and finally the longest part of the diatribe was on religion. In the midst of all this, he got loud and then started asking everyone else what the hell they thought. At this point, I was praying he would finish so I could throw some money at him and run like hell out there!
Whatever happened to having a regular conversation only to find out in passing that your barber did time? Not that would be a major shock, at least the conversation would work back to sports or how wack politics are in the age of Obama. I would have much rather everyone in the barber shop had a screaming match about football than to have witnessed the rant I had the dishonor to sit through over 24 hours ago.
After paying for that haircut, I have one more shop to check out. It can’t get much worse than this right? Well if it does I may have to buy some clippers and DIY or pay my future mother-in-law for a cut…
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